Meeting Our Daughter

DH and I went back to our room, prayed, paced, looked out the window (still lightly snowing), and waited. We were told they would start the surgery at 4:30. At 4:45, the nurse that was going to be in the OR with her came in and said they would start at 5:00. At 5:20, the nurse came back and told us to come meet our daughter. She had been born at 5:12.
Our baby girl was waiting for us in the nursery. She was born 9 lb. 5 oz. but she still looked small to us.  She had dark hair, the most perfect round little face, and a loud set of lungs!
BM had expressed to the nurses that she wanted me to cut the cord. She was still in recovery and DH was worried that BM didn't get to hold the baby first, but the nurse assured us that BM wanted us to cut the cord, she wanted us to hold the baby. DH held our beautiful daughter, then I got to cut the cord. She was not happy about being exposed. She couldn't wait to be bundled up in her blankets and little hat. We were able to bring sweet Gracie to see her BM in recovery. Even though BM was a little loopy from meds during the surgery, she was still as sweet as pumpkin pie. She had just had our baby, but she said "It makes me happy to see you happy. Congratulations." Have I told you how awesome she is? Unfathomable. Just wow.
BM needed rest.  We were able to keep Gracie in our room that night, all except for the constant influx of nurses coming in at random hours to take her to get screened, tested, poked, and prodded.  It's funny how much you "forget" about taking care of a newborn.  It had been 4 years, so DH and I were a little rusty that first night.  It's amazing, though, how it all comes flooding back.  "Oh yeah, I remember that!"
The rest of the hospital stay was just as great.  It was awesome spending that quality time with BM and her mom, too.  Sometimes Gracie would stay with us, other times BM asked us if it was okay for Gracie to stay in her room.  Were we worried?  Not at all.  There was a trust there that can't be described.
I can't get over how well the hospital staff treated us.  They even served us the fancy dinner that new parents get after their little ones arrive.  BM and her mom got a meal and so did we.  The plan was to eat dinner together, but we had dessert together instead since BM needed her rest.
All too soon, it came time for us to leave the hospital (after mounds of more paperwork).  This was the most difficult time of the whole experience.  Even though BM was happy for us, she was still grieving. Understandably.  We were prepared for that.  What we weren't prepared for, however, is the emotions WE would feel leaving the hospital.  We were so excited to have our new bundle of joy to love forever, but we were also so sad for the BM.  We grieved right along with her.  Even though we all agreed that we were all gaining new family, it was still very real that the child she had been carrying for the last 9 months was not going home with her.
BM and I exchanged cell phone numbers to text each other, even though we probably weren't supposed to.  All communication is recommended to go through the agency at first, until finalization.  However, we didn't feel guilty about this exchange at all.  I think it helped her to know that we weren't lying when we were saying that this isn't the end.  That we are a family now.  That any time she wants to talk to us, we are just a text away.
Before we left the state, we met for lunch one day.  She was able to meet my parents and our first DD. We were even able to take some professional pictures together on a different day.
I am so thankful for Gracie's BM.  She is a beautiful person, inside and out.  I love knowing that Gracie will be able to talk to her whenever she wants.  I love that we are all family and that there are no secrets.